October 26, 2010

Proud and Elite: Compliments of Kevin Drum, here are my answers to the Berlinski Quiz on my plebian qualities, or lack thereof:
1. Can you talk about "Mad Men?" Yes. It pretty much encompasses all of my cultural thinking.
2. Can you talk about the "The Sopranos?" Yes.
3. Do you know who replaced Bob Barker on "The Price Is Right?" Drew Carey, right?
4. Have you watched an Oprah show from beginning to end? Probably, but I can't say for sure. It may have been when she was still doing shows about Satanic cults molesting children.
5. Can you hold forth animatedly about yoga? No.
6. How about pilates? No.
7. How about skiing? No. Never skied in my life, not once.
8. Mountain biking? No.
9. Do you know who Jimmie Johnson is? Yes, but I know more about who Jimmy Johnson is. Haven't really paid much attention to NASCAR since Dale Earnhardt died.
10. Does the acronym MMA mean anything to you? Yes. It means the games I want to watch on Saturday are going to be preempted at South.
11. Can you talk about books endlessly? Yes.
12. Have you ever read a "Left Behind" novel? No.
13. How about a Harlequin romance? No. Both 12 and 13 are an extremely cliched notion of what's popular in Red State America (as is 9, for that matter)
14. Do you take interesting vacations? As opposed to uninteresting vacations? Sure.
15. Do you know a great backpacking spot in the Sierra Nevada? Yes. It's called Yosemite, and it's one of the most visited sites on the planet.
16. What about an exquisite B&B overlooking Boothbay Harbor? Until reading the Murray column, I had never heard of Boothbay Harbor, so I suppose the answer is no.
17. Would you be caught dead in an RV? If I had the money to buy one and the affluence not to work, I wouldn't mind in the slightest. In fact, I'd probably drive tween Yosemite and Boothbay Harbor. I once even spent the night in my grandpa's RV up in Kernville.
18. Would you be caught dead on a cruise ship? Dumb question. Cruise ships vary between the ultra-luxury variety (ie., Crystal, Silverseas), the premium ships most people think of when they of cruising (like Princess or Cunard) and the three-day booze cruises down to Ensenada. Had Murray really wanted to nail his point, he would drawn the distinction, and said that the New Elite "wouldn't be caught dead" on a Carnival or Royal Caribbean ship, where many of the passengers probably also vacation in Branson and read Paul LeHaye. But since he didn't, yes, I would, and in fact, do.
19. Have you ever heard of of Branson, Mo? Yes, but I wouldn't be caught dead there.
20. Have you ever attended a meeting of a Kiwanis Club? No.
21. How about the Rotary Club? No.
22. Have you lived for at least a year in a small town (besides college)? No. Other than college, I've lived in LA my whole life. So far.
23. Have you lived for a year in an urban neighborhood in which most of your neighbors did not have college degrees? No.
24. Have you spent at least a year with a family income less than twice the poverty line (other than college)? Yes.
25. Do you have a close friend who is an evangelical Christian? Several, in fact.
26. Have you ever visited a factory floor? Yes.
27. Have you worked on one? No.
So according to this quiz, 16 of 27 answers would identify me as a Red State, potato-eating, Fly-over country, teabagging lumpenprole. Crap.

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